She didn’t want this “something new.”
A Florida bride is blue after discovering her new husband filled out their marriage certificate stating that she would be taking his last name — despite previously agreeing she wouldn’t.
The unidentified 28-year-old woman vented her frustrations on Reddit last week, as well as her plans to leave her unsuspecting husband.
“It’s been one month since my (28f) wedding with ‘Fred’ (28m) and I am refusing to sign our marriage license and now I am honestly considering leaving him,” wrote the frustrated bride on the site’s relationship forum.
“For 6 years, I believed Fred and I were on the same page about what we wanted from one another and our future,” she continued. “We AGREED (as in he’s made this point as well) we didn’t want children — EVER — and I made it clear before and during wedding planning that I wasn’t changing my last name — EVER.”
“He AGREED to this,” she added. “I am an only child, while Fred has 3 brothers. My last name dies with me, while his family’s last name will ‘continue on.'”
The woman says taking a husband’s last name is an “archaic tradition that feels more like the transfer of property to a man, than a union.”
The bride claimed her now-husband pushed her to have a very public ceremony, where they would sign the marriage license in front of everyone.
Having inked his name first, the newlywed had his hand “placed really weirdly on the document,” the poster noted.
The woman stated she engaged in “an awkward, quiet battle about it” until he relented and revealed what he was hiding.
The bride claimed that he “went behind my back and PURPOSELY filled it out so I would be taking his last name,” adding that she “f—ing trusted him so I never thought once that in any world I would need to review what he filled out or to even review the license when we had it in hand.”
Not wanting to cause a scene, the bride pretended to sign the document, lamenting that her big day is ruined, and her lover is “all about tradition now and how it’s his right to have a wife with his last name.”
The besieged bride concluded her post by saying that she feels “manipulated” and like she “wasted our guests’ time, our and our families’ money for the wedding, and now our future together.”
Several Redditors engaged with the post, with some proposing next steps.
“This is how abusive marriages start,” declared one Redditor. “Not openly and violently, but with small incremental changes to who you thought you were with. Slowly the ‘real’ him comes out into the open once you find yourself with ever-reducing options.”
“You acted in good faith; you didn’t waste anyone’s time,” sympathized another. “Please be kind to yourself. It’s not your fault that you were deceived by someone who was doing their best to deceive you! You’re the victim.”
“Agreed. OP do not feel guilty because of his actions, you did nothing wrong,” assured a third user.
“‘It’s his right to have a wife with his last name’ is total bulls–t, it’s your right to choose. You are not his possession.”